Living in Light

Luann's Blog

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Luann Tennant Coyne

Luann writes children's books, meditations, and articles on being a mother, a grandmother and a responsible adult in our world.

The Beam in the Bay

Here on the Gulf Coast I walk on the beach every day, beside the water.

I’ve always felt close to God on a beach. Here is where I bring my concerns, my issues, my questions.  I try to throw them all into the water and then listen for solutions to float back.  This morning I stand here in prayer for Frank’s sister, who is gravely ill. 

Today I’m remembering a time years ago when I had a strained relationship with the church, but longed for the solace of connecting with my Higher Power.  I was in Traverse City, MI, visiting my parents. It was a Sunday, but instead of going to church with them I drove to Grand Traverse Bay, on Lake Michigan, and spent the “church hour” on the beach.

I remember sitting beside a tiny creek that ended at the bay. It was such a small creek that its current barely made a ripple as its water poured into the lake.

An eight-foot-long water-soaked wooden beam had washed up on the beach near me.  One end of it was moving slightly in the current from that small stream.

Thoughtlessly, I gave that huge wooden beam a shove.  I guess I wanted to see if it would float.

It did float.

It did more than that, however; it slowly moved away from me, riding the current from that little creek.

This is really cool, I thought, until I realized that the beam wasn’t stopping.  It was continuing steadily, inexorably, out into Grand Traverse Bay. I suddenly realized what would happen if a boat or a jet ski ran into that heavy water-logged beam, which was mostly submerged and almost impossible to see.  But it was too late.  Horrified, I watched that beam, now 40 feet away and still going, continue its journey out into the lake.

I did some praying then! I prayed and prayed that no one would suffer because of my foolishness.  But there was nothing I could do. I was powerless to bring that beam back to shore.

I prayed and watched that beam until I could barely see it anymore.

Then I sighed and closed my eyes, seeking the spiritual link with God that I had come here to find. It was certainly not something I felt I deserved at the moment.  But, nevertheless, I found it.  “It’s ok. I’ve got this,” I heard, and a sense of peace flooded over me, in spite of my boneheaded error that could still cause a catastrophic end to someone else’s day.

After a period of time with closed eyes, I looked again at the bay… and couldn’t believe my eyes.

That heavy wooden beam was floating back to shore.

That beam not only floated all the way back to shore, it beached itself close enough to me that I could reach out and touch it.

As I dragged that heavy beam up to safety on the beach, I shook my head in awe.  And wonder.

I felt such a sense of warmth, of being cared for.  “I’ve got you,” said that voice which was not my own. “Just like I fixed this problem, I’ve got my hand on all your other problems and issues. There is nothing you can do,” that voice said, “to go outside the circle of my loving care for you.”

Today, on the beach in Ocean Springs, as I pray for guidance, I hear the same voice.  “Don’t fret,” it says.  “I’ve got this.  Just like my hand brought that beam circling back to you, my hand is on the circle of your life, and the circle of Frank’s sister’s life. Stop fretting about what you can and cannot do.  Whatever you can do, now and in the days to come, will be enough.  All is well.”

****

Thirty years after that incident on the beach in Michigan, I’m a peaceful member of a different church.

I still go back to nature, however, especially the beach, when I’m seeking my Higher Power.

And I always find him, there, in the waves.  (And the currents. 😊 )

 

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